Jiu Jitsu jokes

In Jiu Jitsu, you learn to roll with the punches...

but mostly without them.

It's funny how in BJJ

Getting another stripe can make you feel both accomplished and more of a target.

My instructor is so good at jiu-jitsu

He wanted to get a bird's eye view.

Ever notice how a jiu-jitsu gym is the only place

Where trying to strangle your best friend is considered bonding?

Why did the jiu-jitsu practitioner always bring string?

To give accountants someone to chuckle at.

I just started Jiu Jitsu classes

And the only thing I've mastered so far is tapping.

So, I told my friend I was taking up Jiu Jitsu.

… too much tweeting in the bedroom.

They told me Jiu Jitsu would help with ground control.

Because the box labeled it as an 8-12 year project.

Why was the jiu-jitsu champion also a great fisherman?

The sperm has a 1 in 250,000 shot at becoming human.

Getting a black belt in Jiu Jitsu is like baking a cake.

Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.

In Jiu Jitsu, you learn to roll with the punches...

but mostly without them.

I asked my date if she's into close contact sports.

She said "No." So I guess no Jiu Jitsu and chill tonight.