100 Funny Jokes About Jiu Jitsu

You know the type. He wears a Shoyoroll hoodie to weddings, flip-flops in January, and has a pair of lumpy cauliflower ears he pretends to be embarrassed about. He watches instructionals at 1.5x speed at 2am, shrimps across the lounge carpet during the evening news, and cannot shake a stranger's hand without silently assessing their wrist grip. If he has ever called jiu jitsu 'the best therapy there is' within five minutes of meeting someone, this book was written with him in mind. Perhaps you are the long-suffering partner who has been 'drilled' on the living room floor without consent, or the sibling who no longer asks what 'rolling' means because the answer is always far too long. Maybe you are the mate who has watched a perfectly normal man reinvent his entire personality around heel hooks and John Danaher. This collection lets you affectionately mock the obsession without having to sit through another frame-by-frame breakdown of an ADCC match. And if you are the one with the gi-scented backpack, the towel-wringing grip routine and strong opinions about whether that was a neck crank or a choke, welcome. Whether you are a mid-life awakening blue belt, a rashguard-only leg lock zealot or a philosopher who believes every problem can be solved by framing and creating space, you will find yourself on these pages. Just remember to tap before the laughter gets dangerous. Oss, or not, depending on which side of that debate you are on.